This year, the flu epidemic is supposedly at it's highest since, I don't know- 2001 or something. My entire family has been knocked down by this illness. My little one first, then all at once, the rest of us. Ho. Ly. Crap.
I have spent the last few days doing a lot of nothing. There have been moments where I was so done with feeling horrible that I practically talked my body out of feeling weak and achy. Hurriedly attempting to reclaim my health, my hopes were smashed to tiny bits when I realized that I was completely drained of energy from walking down the stairs and preparing a cup of coffee.
I have had dreadful nights of very little sleep and (even worse) wasted days of sleeping and resting all day long. I can't get comfortable. Too hot. Too cold. Too achy. Too congested. Wahhh wahhh waaaaaahhhh...
There is a bright side, however. It makes me love love love and long for health. I have been daydreaming of being too cold during a long run. As I sit and type this I am smiling at the thought of finishing one too many loops at a local trail. (See that, I am not even whining about the fact that we still can't run on the boardwalk right now.) Rain and sweat and gatorade that is too sweet and energy gels that are even sweeter border on fantasy material for me right now. It is rare that your reality becomes your deepest desire. What a delight to know that what I want the most is within my reach. Only when something is lost, do you realize how much you long for it. I am not thinking about whether or not I ate too much. I am not concerned about whether or not I have gained weight. My mind is not plagued by intimidation over pace, distance or duration. All I want is what I have had all along and will have again, any ol' day now: to get out there and run.
Are my desires too simple because it doesn't dawn on me to dream about a luxury vacation or a dream home tucked away on a tropical island? Am I too grounded in my reality, should I be dreaming bigger? I hope not. I like the fact that what I yearn for the most right now is something I have had all along.